It began with a Reddit user’s wife having difficulty remembering the words “tape measure”:
via Redditor UniverseProjects (careful, it’s hysterical)
Which (brilliantly) actually makes sense when you realise she’s a Russian living in a non-metric system - the Russian word for “tape…
1. Aww look at that - she’s thrilled that dinner is a succulent blood-clot on toast
2. This girl doesn’t need cereal - she hungers for your soul
3. Not so much a child, more a 40-year-old Tory/transgenic pig hybrid
4. This murderous moppet should not be allowed a sharpened knife
5. Not appropriate, mister ad-man. Not. Appropriate.
If you’re going to be a serious player on social media, you need to get in early: at last count over 200 million people have registered Twitter accounts, gobbling up all the most desirable usernames: good luck getting your own name, unless you were christened @dr_horseotron.
The cream of the…
Chocolate Santa is a little NSFW
1. When you try to put the duvet cover on back on the duvet
And instead end up doing a graceless dance, which fast turns into a wrestle, with the fabric, before balling the duvet up and fisting it into the duvet cover.
2. Using an unfamiliar remote control at someone else’s house
I am writing this letter to you following your recent interview to promote your tour on Newsnight.
I agree some things need changing as society does feel rather unfair for a lot of people. As mentioned in your New Statesman piece, in the issue you edited, there is a culture…
Yesterday I visited Tate Britain. It is a wonderful collection of inspiring British artworks.
Unfortunately I left it feeling rather depressed. Depressed by my fellow human.
I saw countless people walk up to paintings, snap a pic, walk away. Rinse & repeat.
They never even looked at the…